Question: I have a handsome friend who is twenty-two years old. He has had love relations with more than thirty girls since he became an adult, as he claims. Of course, they do not know that. He exchanges love affairs with each of them and promises to marry them in the future. He might even practice something unlawful with them; I am not sure, but I would not put that past him. He tells me that he, via the telephone, makes friends with them, deceives them, and then laughs at their naiveties. When he satisfies his desires, he fabricates an excuse to move on to his new quarry! He describes girls as an amusement and they are like toys in his hand.
I have advised him to give up these prohibited acts, but he often invites me to join his deceitful table saying: we have to enjoy our lives!!
Sometimes, he lifts the telephone and lets me hear the voice of a girl who has been deceived by his words of love. When I see this, I become so angry at the naivety of our girls. I myself know some of them who are from noble and honorable families, but I fear that troubles may happen if I tell their families about this.
O Sheikh, please tell me how to deal with this friend so that Allah may be pleased with me and that my conscience may be at ease, and also tell how to protect the honor of our girls from such beastly human beings!
The answer: Dear faithful brother, may Allah bless your protectiveness! As for your friend, though he really is not a friend, you should ask him: how would you like to see a young man do with your sisters or nieces the same thing that you do with the daughters of other people? In the future, when you get married and have daughters, and when your daughters grow up and become teenagers, how would you feel if you saw a young man doing with your daughters as you do with the girls of your society today?
Continue guiding him with the aid of clergymen and religious people, and do not let him play with the honors of people and Muslim girls! Be certain that the girls will thank you, even later on, and thank whoever tries to protect their reputations.
As for those girls whom you know, send them unsigned letters in which you advise them due to religion and protectiveness. Tell them that they are being deceived by one who deceives other girls at the same time.
I have a word to say to the oblivious fathers and mothers of these girls: awake from torpor and loss! Where are your conscience and jealousy? Where are your honor and magnanimity? Where are your dignity and morality? Why have you sunk into the pleasures of this world to the degree of vice and scandal? Do you not see death, the grave, and torment? Are there no graveyards in your town to visit and from which to take lessons from the people in the graves and ponder on their states under the ground?
Alas for the loss of good morals!
O our Lord, we seek Your protection from misleading fancies and from following the mirage of the Satan. O Allah, awake us from the torpor of ignorance and take us peacefully to the eternal abode near You!